/ˈfir/ noun an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.
For the better part of my 20s I let fear and anxiety control more of my life than I care to admit. Now, I know that motherly anxiety is normal. Is my child happy? Well Fed? Hitting milestones? Am I bad mom? Will anyone notice I wore this shirt 2 days in a row and am living off caffeine and dry shampoo?
That’s not what I’m talking about here.
I’m talking about the gut wrenching, knot in your stomach, sweaty palms, racing heart, fear. I let it rob me of so much joy and happiness and adventures! January of 2017, months before my 30th birthday, I decided to tell fear to take a hike. I was done with letting it take control.
My mom and her fiance’ were living in Boulder, Colorado at the time and invited us to come visit them for my 30th birthday in April. This would involve….flying. *Cue the sweaty palms* Flying was one of those things that the craziest kind of fear, the irrational kind, had always played a part in.
“But what if the pilot has had no sleep and does something wrong?
What if the people doing maintenance on the plane do something wrong?
WHAT IF I DIE IN A FIERY BALL OF METAL PLUMMETING TO THE EARTH!?”
The old me would have begged to drive there (Ok, I may have mentioned driving a time or two before this trip also) But I was done with that. A couple clicks later, 4 airline tickets were purchased and my journey towards moving past fear was underway. In just a few months I would be on a plane…flying…4 hours…30,000 feet…*gasp*.
April came and went and I had the time of my life. My sweaty palms and I got on that plane (along with my husband and two kids) and we flew to Colorado. I climbed mountains on that trip. Physical, mental, emotional mountains. On my birthday, we went zip lining through the Rockies. I let total strangers strap me (and my children) into fabric harnesses and send us flying across cables, dangling over tree filled valleys….and it was magnificent. We hiked up the Flat Irons that overlooked Boulder. We walked through snow covered forests to breathtaking waterfalls. We took hairpin roads through the mountains. We explored and went on adventures and laughed and grew. Had I let fear overcome me, I would have missed it all (…except turning 30).
When my family and I came back from that trip we were forever changed. Drawn towards the mountains and determined to live a life more adventurous together. I made a promise to myself to fight those irrational fears that had always held me back. So that is exactly what our mission became and the next year and a half would be a whirlwind of travel and emotions and change. Irrational fear had died and McGinns On the Move was born.
Keep moving, my friends. -Sarah